Overcoming Disappointment

There is only one reason any person becomes disappointed.

It’s when we let our expectations grow larger than our motivation.

I should have gotten that promotion.

I can’t meet the right person.

I was really looking forward to this weekend and now our plans are cancelled. 

Stay motivated to succeed, to be enriched by friendships and rewarded for hard work but don’t expect it.

Disappointment comes from anticipation.

Work toward what you want in the present, the only place it cannot disappoint.

It is the future that is not ours to anticipate no matter how hard we try.

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Dealing with a Jerk

Life comes with obnoxious people but letting them ruin your day, your life or career is not necessary.

There are five ways to deal with a contemptible person.

  1. Ignore them.
  2. Don’t reply quickly to anything they say.
  3. Prove them wrong but say it indirectly to avoid further confrontation.
  4. Define your boundaries beyond which you will speak up and stop the bullying.
  5. Get them out of your life (and that includes family members).

No one has to suffer a bully unless they are prepared to continue losing their self-respect.

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How to be More Productive

Taking on more responsibility and the anxiety that goes with it is no way to become more productive.

If you try to do two or three things on the way to more productivity it will not be as effective as deciding on one thing then committing everything you have to it.

Even then, when feeling overwhelmed, slow down.

Counterintuitive?

Maybe, but working faster is not as effective as working better.

Often teams assign more than one thing for participants to handle at one time.  What brings more productivity is to winnow down to the one thing that is most important at this moment, this meeting, this virtual gathering.

Once completed, the results will likely be better and you can go through another list of tasks or projects that are important.

The most productive people are often the ones who do less but are more focused on what really matters.

Just assigning work is a wish list that never comes true.

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The Apology No One Can Resist

The apology no one can resist is sincere not manipulative.

Starts with the specific thing you are sorry for.

Contains a reparation for it or promise to fix the problem.

“It’s been bothering me that I have excluded you from socializing with our friends.  I could have invited you to celebrate with our family and didn’t for which I am very sorry.  In the future, may I invite you to more social events that are with our friends or family?  I’d like that.”

I’m sorry is not embarrassing, it is empowering.

It shows we have a heart, a conscience and a hidden strength to take action to do the right thing.

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Become Empowered

Everyone wants to be empowered, but the path toward empowerment is often more emotional than meaningful.

Strength, confidence … more control over your life.

Empowerment doesn’t come from saying it.

You can’t start today and vow that you will seek to become more empowered.

Unless and ironically, you take the focus off of you.

Helping others become stronger makes you stronger.

The mother who teaches her children that to help others win, dream big, overcome adversity and accomplish their goals retrains the brain to turning words into action for her as well.

Are words better than actions?

Make empowerment an action word to unlock the strength you have been seeking.

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