Self-Doubt

Achievers don’t care if they fail.  In fact, they expect more failing than succeeding.

If you go fishing and expect every hook with bait to net you a catch, you’d soon give up fishing.

Self-doubt is created by harboring exceedingly high expectations for ourselves that have little chance of being met.

Jeff Bezos didn’t build Amazon into the amazon that it is by expecting everything he did to succeed.

Google has failed many more times than it succeeded, but when it succeeded, it was big.

Here’s what to build confidence on.

Bet on your ability to keep trying and never quit.  To not expect results every time you do something.

Replace self-doubt with self-assurance that comes from knowing that if it’s worth having, it’s worth pursuing until you get it.

Never doubt yourself ever again.  Why bet against you?

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More Valuable Than Money

If you keep bailing people out and fixing their problems, don’t be surprised if they keep coming back to you again and again for more.

When you’re hit up for a loan, don’t be surprised if the recipient after first greeting your generosity with elation winds up resenting you.

More valuable than money is helping someone fix their problems or finding a way to handle the shortfall in revenue that they find themselves in.

It is no gift to make loans or to live another person’s life.

The real gift we have to give is also the one that we give ourselves.

Time.

Help.

Being a good listener and a constant source of encouragement.

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Anxiety Cheat Sheet

99% of what I am worried about will never happen. 

The 1% that does, will never happen as I fear it.

Imagine the worst thing that can happen, accept it and make it better. 

Get the facts and weigh the facts. 

Be aware of the damage you are doing worrying about what is most likely not going to happen. 

Live in the present not the past. 

The future is not guaranteed so don’t worry about it.

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How to Accept Your Problems

As a Dale Carnegie instructor, I would ask my students to take a 3×5 card and write down their three biggest most burdensome problems that are affecting their lives at that moment.

They were asked not to put their names on the card.

The cards were collected, shuffled and then re-distributed anonymously to the other students.

Once each person saw their card with someone else’s problems, they all asked for their own cards back.  Never was this not true – not even one time.

Even people who wrote down “I have cancer”, “my wife left me”, “I am unemployed and in debt” wanted their original troubles back compared to those of others.

This gives us clues to the answer on acceptance of life’s burdens.

Everyone has problems and comparing them to what they could be helps us to accept and act on the ones we already have.

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What We Can Learn from a Child

How to be playful.

Carefree.

Laughing.

Uninhibited.

Even parents who are around children all day are not able to act a like child.

After all, they are parents.  They teach.  They bark orders.  They accept the awesome responsibility of parenting.

And they are employees at work.  Accept burdens and duties in return for a salary.

Sons and daughters, husbands, wives and partners in their relationships and all the responsibility that brings.

Still, the ability to be happy, playful, and carefree is the transforming gift children can teach us.

In an era of great anxiety, maybe our little ones have the best answer.

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