Disconnecting from Your Phone

We now spend more than four hours a day on our phones on the average.

That’s two fewer hours than the six hours we sleep.

And when all types of screens are added in, we spend most of our day on digital devices instead of living in the present 100% focused on that time.

If that’s acceptable – and it is to many – you don’t have a problem.

If not, it’s time to recognize that the phone is not going to turn itself off, it’s time to take control.

No social media (or at least reduce it because that time is a black hole).

Don’t hold your phone or put it on the table nearby – research shows you will peek at your messages.

Eliminate texting except for specific purposes – the best way to eliminate it is to make a phone call and you’ll probably conclude you don’t need texting.

Check your posture, it’s getting worse as we bend over to use our phones.

Charge your phone well away from where you sleep. If you use it as an alarm clock, buy a $10 clock at CVS.

Phones and children don’t go together. It’s parents hanging on to their phones who teach their children how to ignore them and those around them.

A phone is a tool and not a lifestyle.

If Steve Jobs, the mastermind behind the iPhone, put a strict limit on his childrens’ screen time, the inventor of this wonderous device was telling us something.

You control the phone – not the other way around.

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Where Do We Go From Here?

It’s easy to get caught in the past reliving what went wrong one more time.

But the real question is where do we go from here?

The past is history – history we can learn from but not obsess over.

The future presents all our opportunities but spending too much time on what hasn’t yet happened can leave us fantasizing about what might have been.

But what about today, tomorrow – where are we headed now?

Lost in the past, hurt by mistakes or anxious to get another crack at living the life that only you can live?

Forgive, but don’t forget.

Remember but don’t obsess.

The only thing that matters is what’s next.

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Recognition

It doesn’t take a course in human relations to know how to get someone to like you.

Recognize them anytime you can.

Give the praise backed by evidence to prove what you’re saying isn’t just meaningless flattery.

Giving credit to others.

Letting them share in your success.

Deflecting praise from you to them sincerely.

Making it about them not you even when you may deserve the attention is how admiration turns into respect.

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Distraction

On a flight from Minneapolis to Philadelphia recently only one flight attendant working as a team with another was doing all the work.

The other was on her phone texting and scrolling through social media inflight. She was not deadheading. She was supposed to be working.

The flight attendant doing all the work didn’t seem to be bothered, but in the end, even she sat down and pulled out her phone making it two distracted flight attendants on a two-hour flight.

There are digital distractions everywhere.

You can let it irk you or let it serve as a reminder of opportunity.

Being able to focus on the needs of others at work, at home and in relationships where others are increasingly distracted means advantage to you.

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Better Listening Skills

When the other person said “does that make sense” without waiting for my response, that’s when I was finally convinced.

The world is filled with people who talk and very few who actually listen.

Therefore, developing good listening skills when everyone else is talking gives you the advantage.

Few are born with these skills, but they can be easily acquired with a little determination.

Ask questions, don’t start playing can you top this?

Learn to repeat what others are saying (“so if I am hearing you right, you’re saying…”).

When you speak, the first thing that comes out of your mouth should be compassion (example: “that must have been scary”, etc.).

Offer no advice because people don’t want advice. They want to be heard and they want compassion.

This makes you a special and powerful person in a world of people screaming for attention.

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