Bryce Harper & Giving Up

The Phillies spent $330 million in the off season to sign slugger free agent Bryce Harper.

Harper’s season got off to a slow start and the fans (I know, Philly fans) came down hard on him.  This loss of faith is repeated everywhere from other cities, sports and companies.

What’s strange is how people give up on other people when they are in a slump or down on their luck.

But Harper didn’t.  He’s known for coming alive late in the season in a meaningful way.

Life isn’t all batting 1.000.

No one gets to super-perform every day.

For every streak, there is a rough patch.

The key is when others give up on you, double down on your confidence knowing that it’s only a matter of time to win again if you believe in yourself.

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Always Go First

People don’t want to go first.

At a wedding, no one wants to be the first on the dance floor.  After someone else gets up, the other dancers follow.

At dinner, if the room is quiet, it tends to stay quiet unless and until a number of conversations raise the decibel level.

In the classroom, the majority of students wait for someone else to raise their hand first.

The thing is going first is good for you.  Following others trains us to wait, overthink, create needless fear.

Next time, seize the opportunity.  It’s a way to practice building confidence for when you really need it.

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No One Really Wants Advice, They Want a Listener

No one really wants advice.  What they really want is someone to listen to them, hear them out with judging.

But we call it advice because we want to get the other person’s attention and no one can resist giving advice.

If we can allow the other person to express their feelings, we are becoming an active listener and that’s a person who is valued even more than the one that has all the answers.

Repeating.  Restating. Waiting for the other person’s response.

The best gift you can give is listening to what that person has to say.

No judging.  No problem solving.

They want your ear and they want you to hear.

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Goal Setting

Fred Rogers (Mister Rogers) defined three basic things as most important for children in life that also very much apply to adults.

  1. Helping people feel good about themselves
  2. The ability to get along with others
  3. And appreciate the world around us

Love who you are and how unique you may be.

Learning to play well with others is a goal rarely pursued by adults although it is just as important.

Appreciating the world around us is difficult when that world’s focus is a smartphone.

Looking for happiness and fulfillment is hard to do without being skilled at mastering Mister Rogers’ three most important things in life.

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Hitting “Restart”

Who says we only have one life to live?

The divorcee married the third time – happily– isn’t believing it.

The fired executive left unemployed and without hope doesn’t believe it when they get a better job for more money and more satisfaction.

Friends who reconnect after not valuing each other become friends for life.

When lives are without purpose and meaningless, hit restart.

But here’s the thing.

Living your new life by burying yourself in the past will not yield better results.

The question is:  are you ready to move forward from today on without litigating the hurts and travails of the past.

If so, you just hit “restart”.

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