Changing Negative Thinking into Positive

With as few as only two weeks training in the areas of kindness and compassion, positive changes occur in the brain.

Focusing on these two things help us become physically and emotionally healthier by in essence retraining the brain.

Focus on positive emotions and they magically occur.

Doing good things for others – Even small things that you would think as inconsequential count.

Become more aware of the world around you – Just trying to notice the sand on the beach or the flower in the garden helps re-train the brain.

Live in the now – Ruminating on the past is actually proven to physically adversely alter parts of the brain so living in the present and giving up control can help us.

Accomplish something every day – Attainable goals checked off as “accomplished” are friendly to the brain and our wellbeing.

Be proud of who you are – Perfection has never been achieved by any one person in all of time but the pursuit of perfection bodes negatively on our compassion and caring of others.

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The Real Stephen Colbert

Stephen Colbert’s switch from Comedy Central to David Letterman’s replacement on CBS Television had not been going well.

He was out of character in more ways than one.

Was he the pundit character of his old show or a Letterman-like substitute for the retiring late night host?

Everything changed for the positive when a new producer was appointed and he told Colbert “Stop being funny and go and just be real”.

Why is it so easy to forget to be our natural selves?

It didn’t hurt that Colbert’s sweet spot was politics and last year was a bonanza.

Now Colbert is beating Jimmy Fallon who had been dominant in the ratings.

He seems self-assured.

Colbert is an admitted “control freak” and everyone knows that won’t work except perhaps the actual control freak.

Sometimes everything we’re looking to be is already there within us – just lost trying to be someone else who is not as good.

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I’m Sorry

Why is it so hard to say I made a mistake?

Making a mistake is not a sign of weakness, just humanity.

It is a sign that we are not perfect and sometimes we stand up on a pedestal that we don’t deserve to be on because no person can achieve perfection whether in the public eye, at work or in marriage.

United Airlines took at least 3 attempts at saying they were sorry for basically beating up a passenger and dragging him off one of their planes recently in what turned out to be a YouTube success and a corporate failure.

Politicians who make mistakes virtually never admit mistakes until they are caught red handed.

Dale Carnegie encourages people to admit their mistakes quickly and emphatically.  Translated that means fast and clearly.

If you haven’t apologized lately, watch what happens when you say you’re sorry and sincerely mean it.

Almost always, you wind up feeling as good as the person you apologized to.

One way not to apologize is to say “If I did anything wrong, I’m sorry”.

If?

Every good apology contains sincerity, a bit of your own humanity and simple language.

Apologizing is another human relations tool that is misunderstood, underutilized and a great alternative to hard feelings.

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When We Lose Our Fastball

Humans are not expected to perform any function forever at the same level as they do when they are young.

A 40-year old tennis star is working overtime to compete with a 20-year old.

A pitcher with a 90-mph fastball cannot throw those pitches as their career moves on and often needs another pitch – a slider, curveball or whatever to remain viable.

This is not a sign of weakness but a sign of strength.

The seller who is burned out on selling.

The manager who wants to do something entirely different.

Life is full of endless possibilities if we adopt the mindset to look for that next “pitch” that we can put in our arsenal of skills as we continue to play the game of life.

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Anxiety Breakers

Millennials 19-35 years old have a higher incidence of anxiety than any other generation, but they don’t have a monopoly on it.

If it’s getting out of hand, there are lifelines available …

  1. Consider others, but please yourself – One person cannot be all things to all people without feeling distressed.
  2. Time shift worry to a certain time one day a week– Say, Tuesday night between 7:30 and 8 pm for example.  By time shifting worry, you are not blindly ignoring it but you’re also not obsessing about it either.
  3. Let go – One of the biggest sources of anxiety is trying to maintain some control over a life that seems so out of control.  The best and only way to gain control is to give up control.  We can control ourselves.  Trying to control others is a sure ticket to unhappiness whether we like it or not.
  4. Reign in social media – Social media and even texting to groups sets up a fantasy world of expectations and perceived desires that make us miserable.  Enjoy social media like a Haagen-Dazs ice cream bar, it’s the dessert not the meal.

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