When someone is bullied, they put an end to it by pushing back.

But the bully has still inflicted their damage even if it is stopped.

The victim needs to do one important thing to guarantee that the bully of the day is not hitting and running.

And that is to have compassion for the bully-shamer.

Sounds like something a victim is in no mood to do but it is so very important.

When we have compassion for the person inflicting the hurt, we assure that we will never have to be that person to pushback.

“I feel sorry for her for having to hurt her best friends when all they want to do is like her”.

Or, “It must be awful to be so hurtful to others”.

Or, “Using social media to shame me is so cowardly.  I feel sorry for someone who needs to hurt someone behind their back”.

To be sure, compassion for the offender is not condoning.

Just that one act of compassion nullifies the hurt that shamers and bulliers like to impart on others.

Push back by putting a stop loss on the hurtful behavior and feel compassion for the instigator because by doing so you are also showing compassion for yourself.

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