Solving a Tough Problem

When faced with an important decision, get the facts, weigh the facts and then take this step that can make all the difference in the world.

Ask yourself, what is the right thing to do?

Not what is the most expedient.

Not what will make you more popular at least for now.

Or postpone a decision because you’re either hoping the problem will go away or are afraid of making up your mind.

The right thing to do has never led anyone wrong.

It is what makes people happy, successful, fair-minded and confident in their decisions.

Spending time obsessing over tough problems is better spent wrestling with finding the answer to – what is the right thing to do?

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Being Heard

There are different ways to handle this in the age of attention deficit and digital distractions.

When texting, one thought per text. 

When emailing, any more than one thought, they should be numbered.  No paragraph bigger than one sentence if possible.   

To be effective, appeal to the other person’s self-absorption to gain their attention (example:  “To help you reach our department’s end of the month goals, I’d like to offer this idea”). 

Anyone who can get the other person to accurately repeat back that which you’re saying has effectively delivered the message.

Leaving a phone message today is like talking to yourself – just call, text or email. 

When someone refuses to acknowledge what you are saying, repeat it again the same way as if they didn’t hear it because they didn’t.

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Weaning Off Digital & Social Media

Only do three screen scrolls on Facebook and Instagram once a day – physically put a limit on these black attention holes where we get lost too long. 

Organize your phone into 3-4 screens followed by folders – put attention wasters like social media, news sites, music into these folders so you know when you enter to be aware that you are losing the battle. 

Make it a practice to not open the phone in a bathroom, waiting room or place where you could interact with people or life – at least try.  

Choosing to be on the phone instead of with a child, mate or someone you like even if THEY are lost in digital space is your unacceptable excuse to do the same.

Phones off after a certain hour.  Period.

No work by phone after a certain hour (The French have this one as a law). 

The phone is neither a sitter nor an educator, it’s a tool not a life. 

No phones during a meal (saying you need to leave it on the table to monitor a babysitter is a nice try).

Finally accept that phones and social media that are conducted on them are addictive and without strong resolve, they will rob their users of life and relationships.

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Our Inner Critic

We can be our own worst enemy.

The troubling voice in our heads – that inner critic – becomes comfortable tearing down confidence and self-esteem.  If others don’t do it, we learn to do it.

Change the inner critic that is holding you back.

Defend yourself – don’t allow verbal attacks to go unaddressed.

Speak up and advocate for yourself – it is not the job of others to be our advocates.  We must go first.

Don’t avoid the criticism that stimulates your inner critic – deal with it in a positive way that encourages growth.

Learning to confront and battle your inner critic takes time – it’s not possible to push it away with any one move.

Start now.

Live a life of approval and acceptance from the most important person in your life – you.

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Let Go of Excuses and Focus on the Next Thing

Ask anyone what they did wrong and you’ll get an immediate answer and a long list.

Ask them what they did right and you’ll have a long wait for a short answer.

Handling failure requires moving on.

A bad day is not a bad life.

Failing to accomplish goals is a good thing.

Doubting yourself creates more failure.

Forget everything bad that ever happened and give it 100% of the best you have to offer.

Batting 1.000 isn’t realistic.

Showing up 1000% of the time with your best stuff – that’s how to train the mindset of a winner.

Let go of excuses and focus on the next thing.

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