Putting Smartphones in Their Place

Power off.

There is no other way.

In France they have a law that forbids businesses from emailing work after hours meaning now with all their great French cuisine, you can actually enjoy it.

Power off.

You don’t need to be connected to your children 24 hours a day (and vice versa).  Fact.

There is research that shows if you simply have a cellphone in the room with you, your emotional health will be compromised.

New rules.

When are you available and when are you not?

Social media is fun but it isn’t that social.  It is a tool not a lifestyle.

Where possible don’t tolerate others imposing their out of control texting and surfing on you.  Stop speaking when they divert attention to their devices until it returns to what you were saying.

When you’re off, power off and enjoy the people and world around you in real time 100% focused.

Go to a place like Vermont as I did last year and try to find a cell signal.  After the panic, I learned (at least for the week) how to use my phone at certain times when a signal was available and rest when it wasn’t.

Phones and mobile devices have taken over our lives.  Time to deal with it.

Power off.

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Having It All

Brenda Barnes, the former CEO of Sara Lee died a few weeks ago at the age of 63.

She became famous by quitting her job at PepsiCo in 1997 because she wanted to spend more time with her three children – and yes, the company tried hard to keep her.

She served on some boards of powerful companies while taking the time to devote to her children.

Then in 2004 she returned to the corporate world full-time at Sarah Lee and rose to CEO a year later.

But in 2010, Brenda Barnes had a stroke that ended her career.

Like mom, her daughter Erin quit her job at Campbell Soup to help her mother.

At Sarah Lee Barnes introduced a program called “Returnships”, temporary jobs for people out of work to fill the gap on their resumes.  The Wall Street Journal quoted Brenda Barnes as saying “They didn’t lose their brains” even though a lot of companies would never hire them.

Brenda Barnes died as a result of a second stroke.

Before she died she said that women couldn’t have it all, they had to pick and choose.

Somehow, it feels like Brenda Barnes had it all.

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How to See the Future

Can you remember four years ago?

Where were you?  Who was in your life?  Where were you working?  How were you feeling?  What were your goals and expectations?

Could you have foreseen four years ago where you are today?

Who is in your life – who is new and who has passed away or moved on?

Are you working at the same job in the same place?  If not could you have seen back then where your career would be today?

Your children and family – are they just four years older or in truth have things happened to their world that no one saw coming?

Were you healthy four years ago and experienced health problems today or vice versa?

I returned to New Jersey and bought a house 7 lots away from the one I sold in 2002, survived a familial aneurysm that I had four years ago but didn’t know about until last June.

I lost two of the best friends I ever had.  And expanded my business and taken on new projects I didn’t anticipate four years ago.

Somehow, we are able to look at others and see the futility in getting ahead of our lives – like, “I would never have seen Donald Trump being president four years ago”.  Or, “Hillary Clinton not being president” as everyone predicted.

See the future one day at a time.

That way you have the latest and best intelligence upon which to make decisions.

There is no need to predict the future.

What’s better is to live in the present 100% focused and to constantly review what the joy and bitterness life hands you and the hopes and dreams you have in real time.

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Making People Addicted to You

The magic of TED Talks is that they are designed to give the viewer a gift.

Some meaningful gem that will make their ten-minute videos worth the time spent watching.

We are capable of giving those around us a gift every time we are with them.

A sincere compliment with evidence to make it meaningful to take with them – “you are so good at running meetings because you go out of your way to get everyone’s participation”.

A word of encouragement to keep them motivated — “your hard work will be rewarded”.

Some kind of recognition that they are likely not getting elsewhere — “you are putting in long hours on that project”.

In giving we also receive.

It feels good and makes us feel powerful in a positive way.

The person who can give gifts of praise to others also reaps the benefit of knowing how much they can make a difference in a world of distraction where the good in others is often ignored.

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Living with Haters

Deny them a voice.

Disconnect from them on social media.

Don’t let them intimate you or change your mind out of fear of rejection.

Be on the lookout that you are not becoming more tolerant of haters.

Change yourself, not the world.  Others will adapt.

Differing is good.

Your Instagram life is fine.

Control the only thing you can control – you will not be a hater.

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  • Just going thru email late night here,,, just wanted to say,,HATE is the same thing as LOVE,,, its just a different rainbow color of the spectrum  f emotions logic and reason. As long as haters don’t affect people directly or physically, my idea is just let them do whatever they desire to express themselves and get over themselves. To suppress any emotions or communications is counterproductive to everyone,,,cheers :) good night!