Bummed and Defeated

Why are we so hard on ourselves?

That’s when people give up and when they do this enough they become defeated.

Take a vow to lay off criticizing yourself.

Can’t stop?  Then at least promise to think of something you do very well every time you focus on what is wrong.

Stop relying on other people to buck you up.  Our happiness is in our hands not outsourced to someone else who we may blame later.

I am a hard worker. 

I care about people. 

I am dependable. 

I am the exact person I would go to if I needed a friendly ear.

As fallible as I am, I am awesome because I always care. 

Negative talk from our own mouths is what bums us.

Change the tune and get a lift.

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Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good – The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

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How To Get Anything You Want

Help someone else get what they want first.

No one is more motivated to help you than the person you have already assisted.

If you want a promotion, help the boss get recognized, rewarded or promoted – most (but admittedly not all) bosses will know where the extra juice came from. 

If something means the world to you, can you name what means the world to the person who can help you get it? 

The road to satisfaction always passes through the lives of someone else first. 

You can usually get what you want if you sincerely can help the person who can give you what you want.

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Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good – The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

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Aiming Higher

Golfers who hit their ball off the fairway into the rough or beyond often start searching for it further away than it fell.

Golfers are wishful thinkers.

And they’re stubborn.

They keep looking for their ball in the spot that is way beyond where it actually landed.

That’s why you’ll often see them only resort to walking back to keep searching.

Everywhere else, why do we assume that whatever we’ve done is quite good enough – didn’t advance as far as we like?

What helps us the next time is how high or far we are willing to aim this time.

Optimism begins when pessimism is eliminated from our lives.

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Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good – The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

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Overwhelmed

More than 50% of Americans say they are overstretched, anxious or experiencing toxic stress that affects their health and happiness.

Cutting stress is like a diet – it may work for a while and then the stress returns.

Here’s how to get stress under control by changing the way you look at it.

Focus on only one thing at a time – yes, do not multitask, you pay a high price for efficiency gained by becoming more distracted.

Prioritize all day long – right now, what’s the most important thing you need to do? In a minute or an hour that may change so reshuffle priorities to wind up with the one thing to work on next.

Put all worries, concerns or fears in the back of your mind and deal with them at a time later in the day when you’re not under the gun.

Feel free to let others know when you have reached maximum stress level not by complaining but by asking for help.  Example:  Can I have an extra day to work on this project or does it need to be done now.  Often the next day will be agreeable.

And the big cure for being overwhelmed …

Actually slow down – the slower you go, the faster you accomplish things the first time. 

And pat yourself on the back when you’ve been able to shed the anxiety that living in a fast-paced world brings us.

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Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good – The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

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Being Left Out

What is it with people who feel good when they leave others out?

With social media, it doesn’t even take courage – just a few ill-considered taps on the phone.

Being left out hurts and requires strength of character from which to rebound.

Say things like this …

When I am feeling badly about being left out or not included in some way, I am going to reach out to someone else and include them.  

The difference between being hurt and being angry is hurt will pass, angry will either make you someone you don’t want to be or eat at you.

Love yourself.  People who do are also loved by others. Those of us who get needy become vulnerable to hurtful people.

Distance yourself from people who abandon you — no good can come from it.

Subscribe to these Daystarters for FREE here.

Share them with friends and family by forwarding this email or posting to Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn and other social media with my permission.

Read some sample chapters of my book Out of Bad Comes Good – The Advantages of Disadvantages here.

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